Finding Ways to Accept the Return of Endometriosis

Finding Ways to Accept the Return of Endometriosis
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laparoscopic surgery, accept

Dachshunds & Duvets – a column by Jessie Madrigal-Fletcher

I had laparoscopic surgery almost 10 months ago. The first period after surgery was quite horrific, which was to be expected. Then, the months that followed I couldn’t believe my luck: Having my period didn’t mean losing days out of my life. No excruciating flare-ups, just mild pain. It was a kind of discomfort that doesn’t really get in your way. I was elated and full of hope. 

Then, slowly, as the months progressed, not only did my periods progressively worsen, but also new symptoms and sore spots emerged. Every so often, and without warning, I feel a sharp pain around my right ovary that stops me dead in my tracks, preventing me from even being able to walk. The pain can last up to an hour and leaves me on the verge of collapse. This week, I am seeing the specialist who performed the surgery, and it all fills me with a strange sensation.

Staying positive
Staying positive, head high. (Photo by Jessie M. Fletcher)

Laparoscopic surgery, whether involving ablation or excision, is just one of the few treatments doctors offer to women with endometriosis. It’s exceedingly invasive, requiring a general anesthetic and a post-op recovery period that can last months, depending how much of the adhesions are removed. The issue is that, just like with any other surgery, for the body to heal, scarring must occur. Yet for endometriosis sufferers, this is like adding gasoline to a fire. Adhesions already plague our body and multiply at a perilous rate. This turns something considered an effective line of treatment into something that could also be detrimental to our health.

A while back, I accepted that this illness was here to stay, so I’ve become a champion at managing its ups and downs. But whenever medical tests and invasive examinations creep up on the horizon I feel rightfully uncomfortable. I don’t regret my surgery. I was suffering incredibly, and needed someone with some idea of what they were doing to take a good look at me and attempt to improve my life. However, I am now faced with the fact that not only does my endometriosis seem to have returned, it has done so with a vengeance. 

I’m waiting for anger to kick in, to have a bit of a breakdown, but it’s not happening. I also don’t want any more laparoscopies, which will surely put me at odds with my doctor. So, I’m in a bit of a limbo state, trying to come to terms with it all.

Rather surprisingly, I think I’m OK

So, I ask you, fellow endo-warriors, how has your experience been after laparoscopy? Did it come back? If so, how are you managing it?

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